Posts Tagged David Axelrod

President Obama Introduces His “8-8-8 Plan for America”

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(Dreadmonger -Wash. DC) – President Obama announced in his radio address to the nation today that he would introduce his “8-8-8 Plan for America”  in the upcoming weeks. The plan, as sparsely outlined by the President in his radio broadcast today, provides for reform of the nation’s current tax system and addresses some of the issues that he has given voice to in recent weeks on the campaign trail.

“As you all know,” President Obama said, “middle class Americans are hurting right now. The wealthiest among us continue to be the best equipped to take advantage of the tax loopholes in our current system by virtue of the fact that they can afford highly paid tax attorneys to shelter their income. Our antiquated tax code allows for this via numerous exemptions and loopholes that were designed by and for the rich.”

“But, where does that leave regular Americans? Under the current system, that leaves regular folks carrying a larger share of the burden than they should. This is simply not fair. So, today, I am announcing a new tax reform plan that I have dubbed my ‘8-8-8 Plan for America’. This plan will close tax loopholes for millionaires and billionaires, eliminate write-offs for oil and gas leases and corporate jets, curtail the exorbitant new bank card fees that we have seen in recent weeks, and address the unfair nature of our current tax system.”

“The plan definitively addresses three different aspects of tax reform, each with a proposal that uses the number ‘8’. I will be introducing the details for my ‘8-8-8 Plan for America’ in the upcoming weeks to a joint session of Congress that I will be calling. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure that this joint session doesn’t conflict with any football games.”

The President’s chief campaign strategist, David Axelrod, was available for a few questions after the address.

Dreadmonger reporters inquired of Mr. Axelrod if there were any similarities between  in the President’s “8-8-8 Plan for America” and Republican candidate Herman Cain’s “9-9-9 Plan”.

“As the President rolls out his plan in the upcoming weeks,” said Mr. Axelrod, “you will see that it addresses some of the very serious flaws that we see in Mr. Cain’s current plan.”

“And clearly,” continued Mr. Axelrod, ” the President’s plan uses 8’s which, as you can see, are lower than the 9’s that Mr. Cain is using in his plan. We think that lowering taxes by one in this period of struggle for middle-class Americans, makes for a more rational and equitable tax plan. And, there’s no sales tax in our plan. We really don’t ike that sales tax part.”

“And finally,” said Mr. Axelrod, “the President has added the ‘for America’ part to his plan.  We think that this addition gives the American people a clear idea of just where the President is coming from with his ‘8-8-8 Plan for America'”.

Dreadmonger will provide details of President Obama’s “8-8-8 Plan for America” as they become available.

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President Obama Ratchets Up the Rhetoric – Calls CBC “A Bunch of Slipper-Wearing Sissies”

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On the campaign trail today in Decatur, President Barack Obama continued to dial-up the heat on both critics within his own party and on his Republican rivals. Speaking at an SEIU / Teamster’s rally this afternoon along side James Hoffa. President Obama was unusually animated. He began by attacking naysayers on the left.

“Some say my words the other night addressing the Congressional Black Caucus were ‘curious’,” the President said, referring to Congresswoman Maxine Waters‘ characterization of his speech last Saturday evening. “Well, I’ll say it again, the folks of the CBC, and I don’t limit this to the CBC by any means, but these folks are nothing but a bunch of slipper-wearing sissies.” The President continued to drop his g’s in his address today as he had in his address previously to the CBC. Notably, the President’s “Town Hall” meeting yesterday with Silicon Valley‘s Linked-In organization exhibited none of the g-dropping.

“I just don’t care what those folks have to say about my choice of words,” the President continued. “If I’m too tough well, too bad. This tough love is for their own good and for the good of the Democratic Party. If they think I’m tough, just wait until they get a good look at Rick Perry. His state’s burning to the ground and he doesn’t believe in global warming. He’s executing folks right and left. Folks down there in Texas think he’s lost his mind.”

President Obama then went on to savage the Republican Party, saying, “The GOP has plans to eviscerate you, then tear out your still-beating heart and stomp it into the ground along with your guts. Does this sound ‘curious’ to you? I don’t think folks understand what’s at stake here. Did you see those debates last week? And did you hear that audience cheering for executions and rooting for that poor guy with no insurance to go ahead and die? These guys are scary. I wouldn’t trust any of them. Can you imagine running up on these guys in a dark alley at night?”

“One of them wants to do away with Social Security. Another one wants to do away with the EPA, the Department of Education, and Medicare. Another one wants to eliminate taxes for their wealthy friends. Another one doesn’t care if Iran has a nuclear bomb or not. No other word for it, these guys are either dangerous or just plain nuts.”

The President did not take questions after the address but, Dreadmonger reporters were able to catch up backstage with David Axelrod, senior campaign advisor for the Obama 2012 presidential bid.

Dreadmonger  reporters questioned Mr. Axelrod about the tone of the President’s address. Mr. Axelrod replied, “Well, we are doing our utmost to keep the discourse civil but sometimes the President just gets ‘fired up, ready to go!’. We are just starting to get revved up here. I can imagine that, 12 or 13 months from now when we’re in the final stretch, we may see things really start to heat up.”

Dreadmonger will provide updates as they become available.

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Carville Offers Obama a New Plan – Fire, Indict, Punch ‘Em in the Face!

American political consultant James Carville.

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“The course we are on is not working. The hour is late, and the need is great. Fire. Indict. Fight.” James CarvilleCNN 9/15/11.

Those are harsh words James. The Democratic strategist, in an opinion piece today for CNN, offered his prescription to President Obama for turning around the flagging performance of the Democrats in light of this week’s election results in New York and Nevada. Carville spoke with his usual candor, ratcheted up a notch.

Carville’s four point plan:

1) Fire somebody! Just look around you, lots of folks to choose from here. Jarrett, Holder, Geithner, take your pick. Nobody will miss them, and you’ll be cheered. Maybe even given a ticker tape parade.

2) Arrest somebody! Start with this Solyndra deal. What a cluster that one was! Surely there is some DOE or OMB honcho you can tag for this one. If not, go with Biden. He’s a joke anyhow and that frees up a valuable, wasted slot on the VP ticket.

3) Re-hire someone you fired, fire them again, and then arrest them. Make a spectacle of it. The Romans had it figured out with the Colliseum. They recognized that people love blood and spectacle. Give it to them and then, give them some more.

4) Punch somebody in the face! Not literally, of course, but figuratively. Humiliate somebody brutally and  in public. I would think a Plouffe or an Axelrod would be good here. And, of course, Robert Gibbs. Everybody in the whole country hates that guy. You could sell tickets for that one. Sell out an arena. No, wait, you want to sell out an arena, make fun of Paul Krugman. You could make that guy cry, easy.

Carville said his plan was designed to protect the nation from “these creationism-loving, global-warming-denying, immigration-bashing, Social-Security-cutting, clean-air-hating, mortality-fascinated, Wall-Street-protecting Republicans”.

When asked what advice he would give the White House, Carville said, “One word comes to mind: Panic.”

Dreadmonger attempted to reach Mr. Carville to ask him what he really thinks. He has not yet returned our phone calls.

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Obama Promises to Give Kentucky to Illinois

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On the campaign trail in Illinois today, and facing stiff opposition from Republican candidates Perry, Romney, and Bachmann, President Obama promised to give the people of Illinois the state of Kentucky should voters give him their vote in the upcoming 2012 presidential election.

The President, his Zegna jacket removed, shirt collar loosened, and sleeves rolled up, spoke today from the stage of the livestock auction pavilion at the Illinois State Fair.

“I think it’s a fair trade,” said President Obama. “You give me your vote and I’ll give Illinois the state of Kentucky.”

Noting that Kentucky borders Illinois to the south, the President went on to say that he will make sure that the new, larger state is called, “Illinois, or New Illinois, or Greater Illinois, or whatever you folks decide to call it.”

“Furthermore,” continued the President, “I believe this historic combination will create the first L-shaped state in our nation’s history.”

Speaking with David Axelrod, senior campaign strategist for the Obama campaign, reporters from Dreadmonger inquired as to how the people of Kentucky might feel about the proposed change.

“We firmly believe,” said Axelrod, “that there is a lot of synergy with the merger of Illinois and Kentucky. Illinois has a lot going for it and we think the good people of Kentucky will really benefit from joining that more robust and vibrant economy. And I’m sure there is plenty of room in the new organization for all. It’s a big tent, you know.”

When reporters from Dreadmonger noted that Illinois is a key swing state in the upcoming election and that Kentucky has voted for the opposing party in the last three presidential races, Axelrod commented, “Look, we really think that this is about something much bigger than the outcome of a single election. We see this as a win win for all concerned and a really big step forward for Kentucky. This will kick-start their flagging economy and align them to a real winner. If we thought this was a one-sided deal, well, we just wouldn’t feel so good about it. And it will create, you know, the first L-shaped state.”

Rumors have been circulating within the Obama camp that similar deals are in the offing for Ohio / West Virginia and Florida / Alabama.

The office of Steve Beshear, governor of Kentucky and a Democrat, repeatedly refused Dreadmonger’s request for comment.

A spokesman from the office of Illinois Governor Pat Quinn, also a Democrat, speaking on conditions of anonymity, said, “We were really kind of hoping for Indiana.”

Dreadmonger will provide updates as they become available.

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But Wait, There’s More! Obama To Add Second VP

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President Obama’s re-election campaign announced today that the President will add a second Vice President who will share duties with current Vice President Joe Biden.

David Axelrod, campaign strategist for the President’s re-election committee, met briefly with reporters this afternoon outside the Hercules Industries Battery and Wind Turbine manufacturing facility in Decatur where he was touring with the President.

“President Obama sees this as a balanced, innovative, and pragmatic solution to the challenges that face the US today,” Axelrod told reporters. “By adding a second Vice President to assist the President and Vice President Biden in meeting the urgent demands that face the country today, we are, in effect increasing the size of the core Executive team by 50%. We see this move as an enabler to more effective management and a real time saver for the President.”

Axelrod went on to say, “As the President’s re-election campaign kicks into high gear, consuming more and more of the President’s time, the two VP’s will pick up a lot of the day-to-day responsibilities. For example, Vice President Biden is already managing affairs in the middle east for the President and he has taken the lead role in negotiating the recent debt and deficit proposals with Congress.”

“We see the new guy, or who knows,” Axelrod said with a slight smile, “maybe we’ll have a woman in the role this time. But we see this new person as someone who can take on many of the more substantive functional and tactical activities that currently fall squarely on the President’s shoulders.”

When asked by reporters if the President had a short list of candidates he was considering for the post, Axelrod would only comment that, “The President has not shared that with me but, I am sure he does have some ideas.”

“Jaime’s a good man and, the President feels that we do have some repair work to do with big business. But I really don’t have any idea if he is a candidate for the position or not.”

Reporters from Dreadmonger inquired if the creation of a second position of Vice President was strictly legal under the Constitution.

Axelrod responded by saying, “Well, we haven’t really got all the answers there yet. But if there is some kind of a clause or something in the Constitution that specifically says you can only have one Vice President, we thought we would just change the new name to Viceroy, or Assistant VP, you know, something like that. How does Vice Chancellor sound to you?”

Axelrod ended the meeting with reporters saying, “Gotta run now, guys. The President has a golf game to get to and he’s flying out early tomorrow morning for 10 well-deserved days off  in Martha’s Vineyard with Michelle and the kids. We’ll keep you posted as this idea gets fleshed out.”

Dreadmonger will provide updates as they become available.

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