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Obama Responds to Poor Economy with “Speech-a-Thon”
Posted by dreadmonger in Humor, Politics on October 2, 2011
Dreadmonger Washington Bureau – The White House announced today that, in an effort to address anemic jobs performance and the overall lagging health of the U.S. economy, President Obama will embark on a 10-day “Speech-a-Thon”.
Speaking from the Press Briefing Room at the White House today, Jay Carney, White House Press Secretary, announced that President Obama will launch a 10-day, unbroken string of speeches beginning October 8 and concluding October 17.
“The speeches,” said Press Secretary Carney, “will consist of a series of presentations promoting the President’s American Jobs Act, various campaign speeches, town hall events, on-line events, basketball and golf game speeches, and speeches to his family during his ‘down’ time.”
“The President feels that we are in an urgent situation,” Mr. Carney said, “and that it is time to show his commitment to leading the nation by giving an unbroken, 10-day long round of speeches. The President will speak for the entire time with the exception of meals, bathroom breaks, and sleep. He will even give speeches during family dinners at home in the White House and during his golf and basketball games.”
Mr. Carney went on to say, “The President strongly feels that it is time to get to work. The American people are fed up with the bickering in Washington and the lack of definitive results. There is no action that leads to concrete resolution. So, the President is taking the bull by the horns and delivering his message directly to the American people via these speeches. We at the White House believe that this defines his strong leadership during this critical time in the nation’s history.”
When reporters from Dreadmonger asked if the President would be doing any policy work during the 10-day period, Mr. Carney responded, “These talks will cover a lot of policy issues and will spell out, in great detail, a lot of the groundwork that the President has laid on a host of issues that are vital to the American people.”
When Dreadmonger reporters pressed Mr. Carney about any actual executive activity, other than the speeches, that might occur during this period, Mr. Carney replied, “Look, the President’s staff, Vice President Biden, Valerie Jarrett, our colleagues in Congress like Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi, these people are all hard at work every day with their hands firmly on the switches of government. The President feels that his role at this important time is best served as Communicator-in-Chief.”
Dreadmonger will cover the upcoming speeches as they occur.
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